The Memories We Shared
by Galaxina-the-Seedrian
Summary: (side-story to "Like Father, Like Son"); Currently, Doofenshmirtz is the ruler of the Tri-State Area. This doesn't paint him as a monster to everyone, however. To most people, yes, but not to Schnitzel. Never to Schnitzel. And as long as she can keep certain memories alive, she will continue to think that way.
1. First Meeting

**Yes. This is my apology for taking so darn long to update my stuff...well, not really. I did this for fun, mostly. I don't regret having a life outside of this place. Its also my excuse to put fluff in this universe, since I've made it so sadistically dark and funny. ^^;**

**Okay, so, this is pretty much a side-story. I could call it a one-shot series, and its certainly a slice-of-life, but they all intertwine at some point in the future, so its technically also a story on its own right, I guess. I'm not making this a main project, but I thought it would be cute to make.**

**WHAT?! I can make Doofenshmirtz in this universe CUTE?! Yes. Yes I can. And here's how: half of this takes place when he and Schnitzel were younger. So, yeah...kids are adorable like that. XD**

**Now, I'm not really gonna post much from here; at least not often. I'm just posting it now, so that maybe in the future I can put stuff here. **

**It's open for reasonable requests. The ones that don't prod me to skipping to the obvious stuff, which I won't reveal for those who haven't read Like Father, Like Son. Be creative with them! Have fun with it! You know, if you wanna request something; I don't mind if you do or don't. I have some ideas of my own, anyway! XD**

**Read, Review, and Follow!**

**Enjoy!**

**P/F/P/F**

**The Memories We Shared**

_written by: Galaxina-the-Seedrian_

(~)

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Drusselstien was probably the most miserable place in all existence. The sky was always grey, the atmosphere was dreary, and everyone was practically raised to be cruel or snidely to each other. Or at least it seemed that way, for the most part. It wasn't that people there were completely mean, they were just mostly mean. Surely deep down, there was some form of morality within them, like every human being.

Of course, that would be a lie. What human knows about morality, anyway; least of all in Gimmelshtump?

Gimmelshtump is a well-known place in Drusselstien, but would likely be one that everyone wished to be forgotten. Such a feat was impossible, for this was the heart of Drusselstien. No place was as dark, underwhelming, and mean-spirited as Gimmelshtump. It was here that Heinz Doofenshmirtz, current dictator of the Tri-State Area known as Danville, was raised.

He could write an entire series of books about this place, and all the words that he would use to describe it. None would be very positive of course. In fact, the words he thought of could not even comprehend the sheer animosity he felt for the place. He'd often try to make up new, creative ways of painting the world around him, in all its horrific glory. Where could he begin with how much he thoroughly disdained the place? He would start with the why, of course:

For one thing, everyone in town were morons.

Yes. Not only were they considered completely, and utterly cruel, but they were also not the brightest bulbs in the bunch. For Pete's sake, they argue about how they should make Doonkleberries, or which way goats should be herded, along with a long list of things that clearly did not matter. Heinz saw that it was completely fruitless to go about worrying about pies, when they should be worrying about the economy, and the well-being of the town in general.

Which brought up the fact that the living they had was dreadful. The grass was practically dead; it was grey, and muddy, so it must have been. It was a miracle that any crop could grow in the soil, even if it was probably the worst thing a tongue had ever touched. Heinz could handle it; anyone in Gimmelshtump could. But even other towns in Drusselstien were more prosperous than them. Whoever founded the town likely would have wanted to spite everyone for no apparent reason, or perhaps back then the land was much more beautiful and greener than it was now. Heinz doubted it, but he needed to show some bit of kindness, if he even could feel that for his home-town.

He hated absolutely every single person in that town. Every. Single. One.

They were either despicable to talk to, or too stupid to come up with a general conversation. Besides, they kicked stumps around, as if that would qualify as a ball. Yeah. He wasn't about to break his feet just to prove that he was a "fun person" or if he was even a "tough person". Actually, that proved that you were a Grade-A moron, which practically everyone in this town was.

Now, you're probably assuming that he was being too harsh. Not EVERYONE in Gimmelshtump was cruel or stupid or anything despicable. There must have been at least one person with some decency, right?

...Sort of.

If Heinz could describe Alice Schnitzel in any word possible, it would be...special. She was, by far, the most amazing person he had ever met. He didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but somehow maintaining her way of thinking was phenomenal to him. She was colorful, sweet, and strange. Really strange. He recalled how they first met in every single detail.

It was raining. Heck, it was practically a storm. Lightning flashed in a blinding manner, and thunder roared like mountain lions that lived far away from the town. He remembered that his younger brother, Roger, was hiding under his bed, having feared storms since he was about three. His mother was preparing dinner, and his father was sharpening a hunting knife; his prized hunting knife, that was given to him when he was proven a man, having faced up to the dreaded Goozim, a beast which Heinz was certain didn't even exist.

Heinz on the other hand was in his room, lying in bed. There was a lot of things that he remembered doing. He read a book nonstop, made a drawing of what was appeared to be a freeze-ray, and even stared up at the ceiling for hours on end. Then, after the usual, mundane things he actually found relaxing, he heard the knocking from downstairs.

Unlike his brother, who he would often call a "chicken" for being afraid of storms (leaving out the fact that, once, he too was afraid of storms), he found them comforting. Mainly because he knew for certain that no one was stupid enough to come over in this storm, and at this hour to ask his father or mother stupid questions, or to fawn over how beautiful their child was. Yes, child. Heinz knew that he was the last person on everyone's minds; everyone loved Roger, in spite how annoying and irritating he was...maybe that was just a sibling-thing.

But to Heinz's surprise, someone was knocking on the front door. Someone had proven to be even crazier than most people. He ignored it, believing it to be the thunder, but when it continued...

"UGH!" he screamed throwing his arms in the air, "Who would be INSANE enough to come out in- -you know what? I'm not even gonna go down. Whoever it is will leave in a few minutes time."

Heinz continued to ignore the knocking for about an hour. Yes, it was exactly an hour. He was bored enough to time it while he stared at his alarm clock. The lightning flashed again, and Heinz groaned. No one was going to get that, were they? Roger was too scared, and his parents were too busy. Heinz got up, and decided to chase off whoever was trying to talk to them.

The floorboards were creaky at this time. Later on, his father would fix this floors for the most part, but for now Heinz would always have to tread carefully on the wood, lest he'd fall straight through into the kitchen. He was safe on the first floor, of course, when he reached the front door. He opened the door, and glared. "What do you want?" he growled.

In front of him was a little girl, looking around his age. Her hair was brown, like his own only darker, and her eyes were a dark green. She wore a sleeveless dress, that was a dull shade of blue. That was the most color Heinz had ever seen in town. The girl had this enormous smile that indicated that she was probably going to be the most annoying person he had ever met.

Instead of responding, the girl leaned forward towards Heinz, grabbed him by the shoulders, and licked him on the face, leaving a wet streak on his cheek. Heinz reacted by promptly smacking the girl across the face, and then rubbing off the spit with a look of disgust. "What the h-?!"

"-eck, man!" the girl glared, rubbing her face "That's very rude of you. I was just saying hello!"

"Normal people don't lick others in the face!" Heinz retorted, "Whether its to say hello, or goodbye, or whatever!"

The girl looked very shocked. "...They don't?"

"No!" Heinz crossed his arms, "They do not. In fact, that's a disgusting way of greeting someone. I believe YOU were being the rude one."

"You're right, then," the girl sighed, "I'm sorry. I was being silly again. My sister, Rosaline, said that the proper way of greeting people in Gimmelshtump was by licking them on the face. Said something about the spit seeping into the skin, along with the information of your name...now that I say that out loud, that's actually really stupid."

"Yes," Heinz said, "Yes it is. And you're stupid for believing that."

The girl glared again. "Okay, NOW you're being rude," she said, "We're not getting off on good terms, it seems."

"Clearly."

"Let's start again," the girl smiled sweetly, "Hello. My name is Alice Schnitzel. I just moved here," she turned her head to the side and pointed, "My house is over there."

Heinz looked over. "You mean that house down the street?" he asked, "It's...huge. No one's been able to buy that place for months."

"My daddy managed to...uh...what's the word...barter for it?"

"I believe the word you're looking for is bargain," Heinz stated, "It is an advantageous purchase, especially one acquired at less than the usual cost. Bartering means acquiring a trade, which is a different form of payment entirely."

Alice bumped her head. "Ah, right," she said, "I should know this by now; I'm the family dictionary, for Pete's sake!"

"If you're the family dictionary at your house, then how come you fell for your sister's trick?"

"I said I'm my family's dictionary; that doesn't mean I'm not prone to mistakes. And anyways, you never said your name."

"Oh. Well, I'm Heinz Doofenshmirtz, arguably the only sane one in the entire town. Of course, at least everyone is sane enough to stay in their homes during this storm. You on the other hand..."

"I do this all the time," Alice shrugged, "I always greet someone during a storm."

"...Why?"

"It's a tradition that I like to uphold, thank you ve-r-r-r-rAHCHOO!"

Alice covered her mouth, and Heinz flinched. He stared. "You're getting a cold," he said, "See? This is why your method is just outright ridiculous, aside from the fact that there's lightning that could very well electrocute you."

"The lightning's brightness helps with navi-vi-viga-SHOO!"

Heinz rolled his eyes, and moved to the side. Alice looked at him confused. "Huh?"

"Get inside, before you get even worse," Heinz said, "It's warm upstairs. By the way, do your parents even know your here?"

"They never know," Alice admitted as she walked into the house; this was when Heinz realized how sopping wet she really was, "They just trust that I'll be okay."

Heinz gave a look of disgruntlement. "That's not very good parenting," he stated, "And how long have you been outside in the storm?"

"I've been going from house to house," Alice stated, "They all assumed me to be a Girl Scout, or something, so they kept chasing me off. You're the first person who didn't. Congrats!"

"Well, I actually don't blame anyone for chasing you off," Heinz stated, "It's probably going to flood soon. You'd be swept up in the storm, like anyone else crazy enough to walk around in a storm."

"If I'm so crazy, then, why in the world did you decide to let me in?"

"You're getting sick. I'm not just gonna leave you outside to catch a cold, even if you're clearly delusional."

"Or loony. Or nuts. Or insane. Or psychotic. Or deranged. Or-"

"Wow, you really _are_ a dictionary."

Alice smiled proudly. "Thank you," she said, before glaring, "Unless that was an insult. Then I'd have to punch you."

"I have the ability to throw you out right now into the raging storm," Heinz stated calmly, "Being bulkier than you, even though the difference is slight, I can clearly overpower you with ease. Don't threaten me with violence."

With that, Alice began to laugh nervously. "Okay," she said, "Clearly, my choice of words are not...the best of words, all the time."

Heinz smirked. "Anyways, Alice was it?" he motioned upstairs, "Come with me, and I'll get you a towel."

Alice bounced over beside Heinz. "Thanks, pal," she said, looking over to another room, "Are you...sure your parents are okay with it?"

Heinz simply shrugged. "They never notice anything I do," he said, "Unless its something they order me to do, that is. Trust me. You're in a safe environment...for the most part."

Alice found herself wondering what that meant, but thought it might be a little rude to ask anything. Instead she grinned. "You're alright, Heinz," she stated, "I think we're gonna be good friends."

Heinz stared, his smirk dissolving, realizing what had just happened. He made a friend. An actual friend made of flesh and bone...

...His mind screamed in utter terror.

**A/N:**

**Aaaand, there we go. XD**

**I don't believe in friendships forming perfectly at first. I kinda see Heinz and Alice's friendship (at least in this universe) starting off one-sided...for the most part, anyway.**

**This'll be fun to write for in the future. Of course, like I said before, its not really a main focus. Perhaps I can use this to calm my mind when stress occurs, or something. It's just for fun, and stuff. Of course, it really is only enjoyable to you guys if you know the characters well enough. If you do, then...prepare for feels, or something like that.**

**Anyways, I hope you enjoyed. Please read, review, and follow! :D**

**-GTS**


	2. The Neighbors (part 1)

**Finally figured out what else to write!**

**Soooo, I have writer's block for LFLS...again...so I'll be writing a bit for this. Which is awesome, 'cause I've been itching to write more for this. Now, it wasn't that I haven't figured out ideas for what to write, it's more for putting it in order. Now, I don't think I'll be able to get it exact, but I need to be as accurate as possible. I'm not just writing a fun-filled story, it's also writing down how their past was like, so I should be accurate as possible.**

**As a result, some will be short little moments, while others will be long episodic (mis)adventures.**

**Thank you, **_bilaterus__**, **_**for this suggestion! XD Which, by the way, I am open to...I just won't choose all of them. So keep that in mind.**

**Note: I do not own the characters of **_Phineas and Ferb_**. That honor belongs to **_Dan Povenmire and Jeff "Swampy" Marsh_**. I do, however, own OCs, like Alice Schnitzel.**

**Enjoy!**

**P/F/P/F**

**The Memories We Shared**

_written by: Galaxina-the-Seedrian_

(~)

_**The Neighbors (Part 1)**_

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After that first meeting, everything that Heinz had come to know seemed...well...exactly the same, for the most part. No one else seemed to alter from Alice's presence. If anything, they saw her as a bit of a nuisance, to which Heinz couldn't really blame them in spite her sunnier personality. There was such thing as too much of a good thing, after all. Then again, at this point, Heinz wasn't exactly sure if this was true or not; he just had the vibe that she seemed to be the case.

Heinz himself was a reserved person. He had tried to make one or two friends, but everyone appeared to be dumb at best, and cruel at worst. Eventually, he simply stayed on the sidelines, and completely ignored the world. Not entirely to make him a recluse, of course, but he could care less about how he was labeled as a person or whatever.

Alice was literally the opposite of him when it came to social interaction. While Heinz could care less about what was going on in someone's life, Alice would be constantly asking questions about people, personal or not. The questions varied from deep, horrifying secrets of which no one would ever want to reveal, to what your favorite color was. A lot of the time, she'd ask questions to the point of scaring someone off, or getting her on their bad side. She was, quite clearly, oblivious to this.

Of course, there were the few times of which Alice wouldn't be able to get a plausible answer, or an answer at all. In that case, Heinz would actually sympathize with that kind of people who assumed that by giving her ANY answer would suffice, and felt even worse for the people who refused to talk to Alice about it at all. Alice may seem brainless from time to time, but that didn't make her stupid. She was actually very smart; scatterbrained, but smart.

And she was definitely smart enough to tell if you were lying to her or not.

Heinz remembered one particular instance in which Alice had visited him in his home once again. Of course, this time, she had proceeded to climb through a window that was in the kitchen, while he was lying on a couch, reading a book that had to do with a child with psychokinetic powers. Usually, his mother would be in the kitchen, letting out a shocked yelp upon seeing Alice randomly appearing through the window, but she and Heinz's father were out with some friends of theirs, leaving Heinz to watch over his younger brother. Alice practically fell through the window, and landed on a counter with a thud, and then rolled off to the ground. There was silence for a mere few seconds, and Heinz proceeded to ignore his friend's entrée with a turn of a page.

Suddenly, Alice's head popped up over Heinz, leaning over the couch. Heinz didn't bother to look up. "What is it?" he asked.

"I need your help," Alice said, sounding nervous, "There's danger foreboding upon the land!"

Heinz gave Alice a small glance. "Because...?"

Alice blinked. And blinked. And blinked again. "Well...I'm not sure," she finally said; Heinz looked back to his book, "But it's very urgent, I tell you!"

"Under what circumstances?" Heinz asked, giving a shorter glance before reading a particular paragraph that intrigued him.

"Alright, you know that one house down the road?"

Heinz sighed, put a bookmarked the page, and place down his book, looking up at Alice with indifference. "There are a lot of houses down the road, Alice," he stated, "You gotta be more specific than that."

"No, no, you don't understand," Alice shook her head, "I'm talking about THE house down the road."

Heinz's eyes widened at this. "Ooooh, you mean the one with the-?"

"Yes."

"-and has that weird-?"

"Uh-huh."

"Aaaah," Heinz nodded in understanding, "I see...well, aside from the weird architecture, I don't see what exactly is wrong with the place. It isn't haunted, since the people there are alive and stuff," he paused, and almost smirked, "Well, at least I think they're alive, anyway."

Heinz snickered a bit at his joke, while Alice eye-rolled. Soon after, the serious demeanor returned to Heinz's face. "But in all seriousness," he said, "I doubt the place has any paranormal activity going on over there."

"Yeah, that would be stupid," Alice said, waving it off, "I would have gotten to you once you read stuff about exorcism or something."

"How would you know if I ever read a book about that?"

"Heinz, I think I might know you well enough to assume that if something intrigues you, you'll read about it."

"Fair enough."

"Anyways, I am here to discuss a matter of HUGE importance! The owners of THE house down the road are..." Alice leaned towards Heinz, pulling his head closer to her mouth. She whispered, "Spies."

Heinz pulled away with an unimpressed look on his face. "The owners of the house-"

"THE house."

"...THE house," Heinz began to face-palm as he corrected himself, "The owners of THE house...as in Mr and Mrs. Gumblnick?"

"Yes."

"The people who give kids free candy every time they pass by?"

Alice stared at her friend's unconvinced face incredulously. "Heinz, you have to admit, THAT is kind of creepy," she said, "Especially since they literally do this every time they see a kid, not just on Hallows Eve."

Heinz hummed for a moment before nodding. "Yeah, you're right," he said, "Now that I think hard about it, I understand why you would think that they're suspicious. Besides, if they live in THIS town, they have to have SOME bit of cruelty in them."

"Then why are you being all skeptic?" Alice said, with hands on her hips, which resulted in her falling onto Heinz, head-butting his stomach.

After letting out an "oof", Heinz flipped Alice onto the ground, and glared at her. "Because they're elderly," he said, "They're probably older than MY grandparents, and half of them are dead. They wouldn't be able to hurt mice."

"That's what they WANT you to think!"

Heinz rolled his eyes and picked up his book. Opening it, he lied his head back on the couch. "Honestly, Alice," he said, "You can't JUST base your theories on mere assumptions. There needs to be evidence to back up your case."

Alice began to blink slowly before grinning. "I knew you've been reading those detective books," she said, "Which is why I came to you to begin with!"

"Seriously," Heinz turned back to Alice, "First of all, just because I've read books about it, doesn't make me a detective. If that was the case, you should just read it yourself, and leave me be."

Alice let out a nervous chuckle at this. "He-he, yeah...about tha-"

"And secondly," Heinz interrupted, not wanting to hear another one of Alice's insane excuses, "How'd you even know what I was reading to begin with?"

"Easy. Roger told me about it."

Heinz froze. "...Roger?" he blinked, "How would he have...don't tell me. He was outside, wasn't he?"

Alice nodded with a smile on her face. Heinz groaned, as he place a hand on his forehead, discarding his book entirely. "He's not supposed to be outside while Mother and Father are out unless I'm supervising him," he said more to himself than to Alice, "Ugh, I'm in trouble..."

"You talk to yourself a lot," Alice said in a jolly tone, "You should probably get that checked out."

"Keep in mind that I am the only intelligent being in this town," Heinz said, "No offense, but I'm still questioning where you stand...practically anywhere."

The girl in question didn't seem to pay attention to his possible insult as she began to grin mischievously. "You knooooow," Alice said in a sing-song voice, "I could help you hunt the kid down, if you help me with this case."

Heinz gave a glare. "It's not a case," he said, "For all we know, you could just be pulling nonsense out of your butt...then again, I could use the help in finding my stupid brother...alright, I guess I'll help."

"Yay!" Alice bounced, "This is gonna be fun! Alice and Heinz, Detective Team! Let's go!"

As Heinz was dragged out of the house by Alice, he began to curse himself for being so distracted as to allow his younger sibling to run off _again _leading to what he knew would be a disaster. He probably should have guessed that this would happen, anyway. As depressing as it sounded, nothing really went his way, for the most part.

Once outside, Alice looked around the area, acting as if she was checking to see if anyone had followed her. Heinz deducted that Alice must have been like this while she was trying to get to his home. "The people in this town are idiots, you know," Heinz sighed, "You don't need to act like a ninja in order to dodge suspicion. Trust me, I've been here longer than you."

Alice let out a groan. "Ah, come on," she said, "Let a girl have her fun, please?"

"If this is such an emergency, then I don't think this calls for fun, Alice."

"Ah, yes," Alice nodded, "As usually, Heinrich, you are right."

Heinz stopped, and glared at Alice. "Don't call me Heinrich," he said, "Seriously, it's just Heinz."

"I can call you whatever I want," Alice crossed her arms, grinning, "We're friends. We should be able to do that."

The other sighed, seemingly in defeat. "Alright then..." Heinz smirked wryly, "_Allison_."

Alice stared for a moment, her cheery disposition briefly turning sour at the boy's comeback. "...Touché, Heinz. Touché."

"So," Heinz went on, "Which way did Roger go?"

"He went to one of his friends' house," Alice shrugged, "Forgot his name...Benedict?"

Heinz let out an aggravated sigh. "Benediiiict..."

"What? What's so bad about Benedict?"

"He's just one of those people that I detest," Heinz said, "He's not the best of...influences on Roger."

Alice nodded in understanding at this statement. "So, they get into trouble a lot?" she asked.

"What? Pfft. As if," Heinz rolled his eyes, "Roger's a total goody-goody-two-shoes. He'd never fall into pressure."

"Then what's the problem?"

"He's very gullible," Heinz explained, "He'll listen to anyone. Roger tends to believe that everyone had 'good' in them, and should be given a chance."

Alice tilted her head. "What's so bad about a mindset like that?" she asked.

"There's no such thing as goodness. Everyone has some kind of negativity that outweighs the positive attributes."

"...Well, that's a depressing way of putting it, man."

"Right, you're still new here," Heinz shrugged, "You'll learn."

Alice blinked, but soon after smiled it off. "Okie doki artichoke," she bounced off, "Onward!"

**A/N:**

**...I made it into a two-parter after I couldn't figure out how to continue this. Don't patronize me! DX**

**Not all of these are going to be two-parters; heck, some of these are just gonna be drabbles. Which is fine, because, I think that's what a lot of these things are going to be; drabbles. Unless I come up with longer stuff for it.**

**Sooooo, what do you think? Review if you want! Even follow and fave~. :3 Hope you guys enjoyed this cute little thing that I WANNA EAT UP, IT'S SO DANG CUTE! XD**

**-GTS**


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